Hey there, lovely people! Let’s talk about something we all secretly Google at 2 AM: Relationships. If you’ve ever wondered, “Is this normal, or am I just overthinking?”—you’re not alone. Let’s uncover some top warning signs of what’s not considered a sign of a healthy relationship that scream, “Girl, run!”. Trust me, some of these come straight from personal experience, so buckle up—it’s going to be a fun ride.
Now, don’t get me wrong—relationships are beautiful, exciting, and heartwarming… until they’re not. We all dream of fairytale romance, but what happens when Prince Charming starts acting more like Prince Alarm Bell?
Sign 1: Communication Chaos
Silent Treatment is Their Go-To Weapon
You know that awkward silence after a disagreement? Yeah, it’s normal. But when your partner ghosts you for days over who left the toothpaste cap off—big yikes. Healthy communication is about talking things out, not leaving you to piece together clues like Sherlock Holmes.
Pro Tip: If they can’t text you back but are posting memes on Instagram—girl, you deserve better.
They Downplay Your Feelings
Ever opened up about something that bothers you, only for them to respond with, “You’re overreacting”? Major red flag! Your emotions are valid, no matter how small the issue seems. A healthy relationship involves validation, not belittling.
Pro Tip: If they act like your tears are an over-the-top soap opera, it’s time to re-evaluate.
They Avoid Serious Conversations Like the Plague
Try bringing up future plans, and they suddenly need to “take this call” or “walk the dog” (even though they don’t have one). Avoidance is not just frustrating—it’s unhealthy. A good relationship includes discussions about both fun and serious stuff.
Pro Tip: If commitment makes them sweat more than a gym session, consider it your cue to exit.
Sign 2: Control Issues—Love Isn’t a Dictatorship
They Want to Know Everything
Sure, sharing details about your day is sweet. But when they demand to know who you’re texting, where you’re going, and why you took 5 extra minutes at Starbucks—uh-oh. That’s not love, it’s micromanaging.
Pro Tip: Love should feel freeing, not like you’re living under 24/7 surveillance.
They Dictate What You Wear
Did your guy ever asked you to change your dress because it was “too attention-grabbing”? If they can’t trust you to dress how you like, it’s their insecurity, not your problem. Confidence looks better on you than any outfit ever will.
Pro Tip: If your wardrobe is being policed, it’s time to call the relationship cops.
They Make Decisions For You
From small things like ordering your food to big ones like where you should work, if they’re constantly deciding for you—it’s a no. Partnerships are about teamwork, not dictatorship.
Pro Tip: If their idea of “us” leaves no room for “you,” rethink the “we.”
Sign 3: Disrespect—The Silent Killer
They Mock Your Dreams or Interests
Ever excitedly share your goals, only for them to laugh or dismiss them as “silly”? It’s one thing to tease; it’s another to belittle. You deserve someone who cheers for you, not jeers at you.
Pro Tip: If they can’t support your dreams, they’re probably not meant to be part of them.
They Make Jokes at Your Expense
Sarcasm is fun until it starts feeling like subtle insults wrapped up in humor. Your partner should uplift you, not make you question your worth under the guise of “just joking.”
Pro Tip: If the humor feels more hurtful than hilarious, you’ve got a problem.
They Compare You to Others
Whether it’s an ex, a celebrity, or their coworker, comparisons are never okay. You’re not a checklist of qualities to measure against someone else.
Pro Tip: The only comparison you need to focus on is who you were yesterday vs. who you’re becoming.
Sign 4: The Lack of Effort
Lack of Effort
When you’re the one always planning dates, texting first, or making compromises, it’s exhausting. Relationships thrive on mutual effort—it’s not a one-woman or one-man show.
Pro Tip: If you’re doing all the emotional labor, it’s time for a serious conversation—or a breakup.
They Hold Grudges Forever
Everyone fights, but holding onto past arguments like trophies? That’s not healthy. Forgiveness is key in a strong relationship—without it, resentment builds like bad Wi-Fi lag.
Pro Tip: If their grudge list is longer than their grocery list, something’s off.
Gaslighting Galore
Do they twist situations to make you feel like you’re the problem, even when you’re not? That’s textbook gaslighting, and it’s one of the most toxic behaviors out there and it’s one clear example of what’s not considered a sign of a healthy relationship, Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that can make you feel confused, anxious, and unsure of yourself.
Pro Tip: Trust your gut. If something feels off, it probably is.
Sign 5: Trust Issues
You Feel Like You Have to Constantly Prove Yourself
Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. If your partner is constantly questioning where you are, who you’re with, or what you’re doing, that’s not healthy. Feeling like you have to “prove” yourself over and over again is exhausting, and let’s face it—who wants to live under a microscope?
Pro Tip: A relationship should be based on trust. If they can’t trust you, maybe it’s time to question their commitment to you.
They Keep Bringing Up the Past
We all make mistakes, but if they keep bringing up past mistakes—especially ones you’ve already apologized for—it’s a serious red flag. A healthy relationship is about growth, not constantly rehashing past arguments.
Pro Tip: If they keep throwing your past in your face, ask yourself, Are they really over it?
They Don’t Value Your Privacy
Privacy is key, even in relationships. You don’t need to share every single detail about your life to prove your love. If your partner is snooping through your phone or demanding access to all your personal conversations, it’s time to set some boundaries.
Pro Tip: Trust is earned, not demanded. If they can’t respect your privacy, that’s a huge breach of trust.
SIGN 6: Control and Manipulation
They Play the Blame Game
If every problem is somehow your fault, you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship. Healthy relationships are about teamwork—taking responsibility when you mess up and working together to find solutions.
Pro Tip: If your partner never takes accountability for their actions, it might be time to reevaluate things. No one’s perfect, but mutual respect is essential.
They Constantly Take You for Granted
When was the last time your partner surprised you with something sweet? Or even just a simple “thank you” for something you did? If you feel like you’re invisible or unappreciated, it’s time for a heart-to-heart.
Pro Tip: If you’re giving more than you’re receiving, it might be time to set some boundaries and express your needs.
They Guilt Trip You Into Doing Things
Oh, the classic guilt trip: “If you loved me, you’d do this.” We’ve all been there, but no one should ever make you feel guilty for not doing something you’re uncomfortable with. That’s not love, that’s manipulation.
Pro Tip: If you’re constantly feeling pressured to do things just to “make them happy,” it’s time to draw some healthy boundaries.
Conclusion: Relationships Should Feel Like Home, Not a Battlefield
If any of these warning signs hit a little too close to home, don’t panic. Relationships are complicated, and nobody’s perfect. But what’s not considered a sign of a healthy relationship is when the bad outweighs the good consistently. You deserve respect, love, and someone who genuinely makes your life better—not harder. nobody deserves to be in a relationship that’s draining, manipulative, or downright disrespectful. Remember, what’s not considered a sign of a healthy relationship can often reveal more than what actually is healthy.
Remember, the first step to fixing anything is recognizing it. Whether it’s having a tough conversation, seeking support, or walking away altogether, know that you’re doing what’s best for YOU.
As I was writing this post, I realized how much I’ve learned through my own experiences. Honestly, sometimes we only see these red flags once we’re already too deep into things. But trust me, it’s better to detect these signs early on—before you get too invested. If you’re ignorant about these signs and let them slide, walking away when things are at their worst can be far more devastating for you.
Now, over to you! Have you ever experienced any of these red flags? Share your thoughts or stories in the comments below—I’d love to hear from you!
Until next time, stay fabulous, stay loved, and most importantly, stay YOU.
Check out some more related topics to enhance your health, wealth, relationships and personal growth from here!
